#56 My Brain and Heart Divorced
Recorded during a Madrid heatwave, this is a super short episode to share a funny, uplifting poem. May it inspire us all to breathe into this present moment.
Poem by John Roedel
Resource mentioned in the intro: Make Your Business Dreams Come True with Marie Forleo's B-School
Join the Project Me newsletter list for more updates at www.myprojectme.com
Email: hello@myprojectme.com
Read the Transcript for this Episode below:
Episode 56 of the Project Me podcast. Hello. I hope you're well. I'm doing great. I just got back from a lovely few days in London to escape the crazy heat wave here in Madrid. And I'm now back to the inferno. I've got the air con and the fan turned off just while I'm recording this podcast, so there won't be any background noise.
So I think this is going to be a pretty quick episode where I'm going to melt. I am super excited that this coming weekend I head to Ibiza with my two cats to live and work for at least the next couple of months. My husband is coming too, but sadly he isn't location independent like me and he does need to go back and forth for work.
I just continue to feel so incredibly grateful that I've created a business that allows me to work from anywhere, to set my own hours, and to feel so deeply fulfilled by the work I do. I just genuinely love it. And I owe it to my business mentor, Marie Forleo, and her online b school program, which I did two years ago.
10 years ago, I remember I took that program to learn how to create an online business and how to reach my dream clients from all over the world. I really didn't even know what I was going to do yet, but yeah, B School completely changed my life. And Marie is running a special summer school version of B School, which starts on July 31st.
In case that turns out to be divine timing for you. As soon as you join, you'll get her bonus course called Start the Right Business. And if you join via me, you also get my own set of B School bonuses. And for this round, it includes a place in my High Vibe Journey program, Soul Explorers membership, and a one on one call with me to help you to align to your truest purpose.
And None of that costs you a penny more. I am an affiliate of B School. So it just means that if you join via me, I get a little kickback and it means that I can offer you all this extra stuff at no extra cost to you to say, thank you. So if you're interested in B School or my bonuses, just go to myprojectme.
com. You can go to the blogs tab and you can read my own B School story. You You can read more about my bonuses and you can get that link to B School and read more about all that you get inside of this incredible program. For me, it's just everything I needed all in one box rather than having to do all kinds of separate courses and things.
So I hand down my heart recommend B School all the time if you are starting or growing your own business. Now, on to this new episode, there is a poem that I want to share with you and then discuss it a little bit afterwards. In my Soul Explorers membership earlier this year, amazing member Nicole Barlow posted this poem and she wrote all in caps, God, this is beautiful.
Take the time to read it. And she added, As someone who writes often, I naturally appreciate epic writing when I see it. This morning, I came across this written piece of art, and it moved me so deeply, so I had to share it with all of you. Not only are these words true theater, They also act as sound advice.
Well, Nicole herself is a very gifted writer, so I knew this was going to be a good one and indeed it is. I loved it so much that I saved it and I just came across it now and I decided to just turn on my mic and share it with you too. It's written by John Rodale and I looked him up online just now and I see that he is a writer, poet, comic, storyteller, and terrible dancer.
And he runs writer's workshops in places like Wisconsin, New Mexico, and North Carolina. So here is the poem, which is titled, My Brain and Heart Divorced. My brain and heart divorced a decade ago. Over who is to blame about how big of a mess I have become. Eventually, they couldn't be in the same room with each other.
Now, my head and heart share custody of me. I stay with my brain during the week, and my heart gets me on weekends. They never speak to one another. Instead, they give me the same note to pass to each other every week. And their notes they send to one another always say the same thing. This is all your fault.
On Sundays, my heart complains about how much my head has let me down in the past. And on Wednesday, my head lists all the times my heart has screwed things up for me in the future. They blame each other for the state of my life. There's been a lot of yelling. And crying. So lately, I've been spending a lot of time with my gut, who serves as my unofficial therapist.
Most nights, I sneak out of the window in my ribcage, and slide down my spine, and collapse on my gut's plush leather chair that's always open for me. And I just sit, sit, sit, sit. Until the sun comes up. Last evening my gut asked me if I was having a hard time being caught between my heart and my head. I nodded.
I said, I didn't know if I could live with either of them anymore. My heart is always sad about something that happened yesterday. While my head is always worried about something that may happen tomorrow. I lamented. My gut squeezed my hand. I just can't live with my mistakes of the past or my anxiety about the future.
I sighed. My gut smiled and said, in that case, you should go and stay with your lungs for a while. I was confused. The look on my face gave it away. If you are exhausted about your heart's obsession with the fixed past and your mind's focus on the uncertain future, your lungs are the perfect place for you.
There is no yesterday in your lungs. There is no tomorrow there either. There is only now. There is only inhale. There is only exhale. There is only this moment. There is only breath. And in that breath, you can rest while your heart and head work their relationship out. This morning, while my brain was busy reading tea leaves, and while my heart was staring at old photographs, I packed a little bag and walked to the door of my lungs.
Before I could even knock, she opened the door with a smile and, as a gust of air embraced me, she said, What took you so long?
Mmm, the writer sees the head and heart in opposition, with the head being preoccupied with the future, the heart being preoccupied with the past, and with the lungs, the breath, being in the present moment. Oh, and with the gut having some very good advice, I love all of this as a playful and poignant reminder that there really is only the present and connecting to our breath is the most perfect way to be in the present moment.
We spend so much time future projecting and then when we reach those moments we've been thinking ahead to, we are again thinking about the next thing, planning, imagining, working out logistics or worrying. What if this happens or that happens or playing out imaginary future conversations in our head. Do you do this?
Well, if he says this then I'll say that and we also spend so much time ruminating over the past Which I think is fine if you've got a smile on your face and you're reflecting back on a wonderful memory. But too often it's rehashing out scenes and conversations, wishing you'd said this or done that.
Thoughts of the past can be way too full of regrets and thoughts of the future can be too full of worries. Now in the poem, I do think the heart may be a little misrepresented. The more I learn about the intelligence of the heart, The more I see it as a place of presence, of intuition and deep inner knowing and connection and of course love.
I don't see it as totally preoccupied with the past. Yes, we do store a lot of pain and heartbreak there, so I get where the author is getting that from. But again, it's the head that holds the stories around the past. Just as it carries stories around the future. I do a little exercise with some of the women I work with and it's called the story catcher.
I encourage them to notice when they are narrating stories in their heads and to catch them as if in a net where they can objective and examine this. They can objectively examine the story. I get them to retell the story from another angle, and then maybe even another. And it's incredible how many ways we can reframe any situation, or conversation, or challenge.
And once we do that, we can usually see that there is no definitive right or wrong to it. It's all how we choose to look at it. The story catcher works especially well as a written exercise. You write down the story as you're seeing it now and then you write it again from another perspective and maybe even another.
It really works to soften your emotions around it and often it can even turn the whole thing around and show you a very different viewpoint that you agree with even more now. And I love how in this poem the gut plays the role of therapist and source of wise guidance. I like that. I personally don't feel my intuition in my gut but I know many people that do.
They actually feel it physically in their stomach area if something is a no for example. Do you get that sensation? And the lungs, yes. Being aware of each breath in. And out and lengthening each breath. It really does connect us to the body and reminds us that we are not our thoughts. We are not our emotions.
Our emotions are only our indicator that tell us when we are choosing our thoughts, are we choosing our thoughts, or are we allowing our heads to be filled with random thoughts that are not serving as well? When we are not breathing properly, we disengage with our body, and our head becomes a runaway train.
So let's breathe together right now. And it really doesn't matter whether you are sitting somewhere quiet, or you're on the go. You have to breathe now anyway, so you may as well do it mindfully, right? So, begin by relaxing your forehead. Even if you're running, or driving, or loading the dishwasher, or eating a tuna sandwich, you don't need to close your eyes unless you're able to.
Simply relax the muscles in your forehead. This drops you out of the thinking mind and into the present moment. And now breathe, feel your lungs all the way up to the very top. Hold it for a moment. And then let it all out with a sigh.
Do that again, filling your lungs all the way to the very top, holding, and then let it all out with a sigh. One more time, and if you resisted doing this the first times, this is your invitation to join in this time. Deep breath all the way in, holding it at the top, and then let it all out.
Your breath has been waiting for you. What took you so long? Thank you for listening to the Project Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and you can share it with a friend or in your social media stories. My brand new website is coming in September, and that'll be kellypietrangeli. com.
But for now, you can still find me at myprojectme. com. There's a sign up on the homepage to receive the Project Me Life Wheel tool, and to get updates on what I'm cooking up next, including some fun prize giveaways to celebrate the new website launch. Now, when I was a kid, my grandpa used to say to me, you got to be in it to win it.
And I have continued to win prize draws ever since. So it's true. How can I draw your name if it's not even there? So go to myprojectme. com. Get onto my list if you're not already on it and who knows, I may draw your name. If you say I'm not a winner, this might be your first time being a winner. Keep breathing everyone.
Until next time, open your mind, open your heart, and stay curious. We all need some space in our lives for the magical and unknown.